-=|The Institution of Marriage|=-

INTRODUCTION

1. Another moral issue that confronts Christians today relates to the institution of marriage...
a. Many people are clamoring to redefine marriage
b. Governments are responding with laws that redefine who may marry
c. Same-sex marriage is becoming legal; polygamy and other forms of marriage will likely follow

2. As Christians are confronted with this issue, we do well to ask...
a. What did Jesus and His apostles reveal about marriage?
b. What do they say about same-sex marriage?
c. How should we respond to those in same-sex marriages?

[We begin therefore by looking at...]

I. JESUS AND HIS APOSTLES ON MARRIAGE

A. JESUS' TEACHINGS ON MARRIAGE...
1. Marriage was instituted by God at the beginning look at Mt 19:3-4:

3 Some Pharisees came and tried to trap him with this question: “Should a man be allowed to divorce his wife for just any reason?”
4 “Haven’t you read the Scriptures?” Jesus replied. “They record that from the beginning ‘God made them male and female.

a. Weddings may be a social custom, and variously defined by cultures
b. But marriage itself is ordained by God, not by society or the state
2. Marriage was designed for those created male and female; see Mt 19:4 again:

4 “Haven’t you read the Scriptures?” Jesus replied. “They record that from the beginning ‘God made them male and female.

a. From the beginning this was God's design, and he started with Adam and Eve (not Adam and Steve)
3. Marriage is for man and wife, who become 'one flesh' look at Mt 19:5:

5 And he said, ‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.

a. A man is to leave his family to start a new one, that’s why Man and woman are biologically designed to complement each other.
4. Marriage is a union that God joins, not the state look at Mt 19:6:

6 Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.”

a. Note well: only God does the joining
b. The state cannot force God to do something by passing laws
5. States may therefore declare marriages that are unlawful in God's sight look at Mk 6:17-18:

17 For Herod had sent soldiers to arrest and imprison John as a favor to Herodias. She had been his Brother Philip’s wife, but Herod had married her. 18 John had been telling Herod, “It is against God’s law for you to marry your brother’s wife.”

a. Herod had "married" Herodias, i.e., approved by the state
b. But in God's sight it was "not lawful" for him to have her.

-- Jesus defined marriage as instituted and regulated by God, not the state --

B. THE APOSTLES' TEACHINGS ON MARRIAGE...
1. Sex in marriage is honorable, sex outside marriage is not look at He 13:4:

4 Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.

a. God will judge fornicators (any who practice sexual immorality, we learn that on our previous lesson
b. God will judge adulterers (any who violate the bond involving those married )
2. To avoid fornication, let each man have his own wife and each woman her own husband
a. The solution to sexual immorality is heterosexual marriage look what the apostle Paul teaches in 1Co 7:1-5:
7 Now regarding the questions you asked in your letter. Yes, it is good to live a celibate life. 2 But because there is so much sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband.
3 The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. 4 The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife.
5 Do not deprive each other of sexual relations, unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward, you should come together again so that Satan won’t be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

b. The only alternative is self-control look at the next verses in 1Co 7:6-9:
6 I say this as a concession, not as a command. 7 But I wish everyone were single, just as I am. But God gives to some the gift of marriage and to others the gift of singleness.
8 So I say to those who aren’t married and to widows—it’s better to stay unmarried, just as I am. 9 but if theycan’t control themselves, they should go ahead and marry. It’s better to marry than to burn with lust.

-- The apostles taught marriage is regulated by God and His Word --

[Both Jesus and His apostles have important things to say about divorce as it relates to the institution of marriage, but we will discuss that in another lesson. Let's now turn our attention to...]


II. THE ISSUE OF SAME-SEX MARRIAGE

A. WHAT THE BIBLE TEACHES...
1. Again we note what the Bible clearly teaches:
a. Sex outside of marriage is sinful we saw this in the previous lesson.
1) Whether heterosexual or homosexual
2) It falls into the category of "sexual immorality” which is fornication.
b. The solution to sexual immorality is clearly stated
1) Either heterosexual marriage, we saw it in 1Co 7:1-5
2) Or self-control like we saw in 1Co 7:6-9
c. Marriage is a divine institution, not a civil one
1) God determines what constitutes a proper marriage, not man
2) Marriage throughout the Bible is always between a man and woman
2. We now note the following:
a. There is not one mention regarding same-sex marriage
1) Even though the practice was known among the Gentiles
2) Emperor Nero himself had two same-sex marriages (Pythagoras, Sporus)
b. There is no Biblical teaching on how same-sex marriages are to work
1) Who is to be the head? Who is to submit?
2) All discussions pertaining to marriage describe husband-wife (male-female) relationships, I will use just 1Co 7:10-40 because of the length, but write down the following scriptures for your personal reading before we go there. Ro 7:1-4; Ep 5:22-33; Col 3:18-19; 1Ti 3:2,11-12; 5:14; Tit 1:6; 2:4-5; 1Pe 3:1-7:

10 But for those who are married, I have a command that comes not from me, but from the Lord. A wife must not leave her husband. 11 But if she does leave him, let her remain single or else be reconciled to him. And the husband must not leave his wife.
12 Now, I will speak to the rest of you, though I do not have a direct command from the Lord. If a Christian man has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to continue living with him, he must not leave her. 13 And if a Christian woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to continue living with her, she must not leave him. 14 For the Christian wife brings holiness to her marriage, and the Christian husband brings holiness to his marriage. Otherwise, your children would not be holy, but now they are holy. 15 (But if the husband or wife who isn’t a believer insists on leaving, let them go. In such cases the Christian husband or wife is no longer bound to the other, for God has called you to live in peace.) 16 Don’t you wives realize that your husbands might be saved because of you? And don’t you husbands realize that your wives might be saved because of you?
17 Each of you should continue to live in whatever situation the Lord has placed you, and remain as you were when God first called you. This is my rule for all the churches. 18 For instance, a man who was circumcised before he became a believer should not try to reverse it. And the man who was uncircumcised when he became a believer should not be circumcised now. 19 For it makes no difference whether or not a man has been circumcised. The important thing is to keep God’s commandments.
20 Yes, each of you should remain as you were when God called you. 21 Are you a slave? Don’t let that worry you—but if you get a chance to be free, take it. 22 And remember, if you were a slave when the Lord called you, you are now free in the Lord. And if you were free when the Lord called you, you are now a slave of Christ. 23 God paid a high price for you, so don’t be enslaved by the world. 24 Each of you, dear brothers and sisters, should remain as you were when God first called you.
25 Now regarding your question about the young women who are not yet married. I do not have a command from the Lord for them. But the Lord in his mercy has given me wisdom that can be trusted, and I will share it with you. 26 Because of the present crisis, I think it is best to remain as you are. 27 If you have a wife, do not seek to end the marriage. If you do not have a wife, do not seek to get married. 28 But if you do get married, it is not a sin. And if a young woman gets married, it is not a sin. However, those who get married at this time will have troubles, and I am trying to spare you those problems.
29 But let me say this, dear brothers and sisters: The time that remains is very short. So from now on, those with wives should not focus only on their marriage. 30 Those who weep or who rejoice or who buy things should not be absorbed by their weeping or their joy or their possessions. 31 Those who use the things of the world should not become attached to them. For this world as we know it will soon pass away.
32 I want you to be free from the concerns of this life. An unmarried man can spend his time doing the Lord’s work and thinking how to please him. 33 But a married man has to think about his earthly responsibilities and how to please his wife. 34 His interests are divided. In the same way, a woman who is no longer married or has never been married can be devoted to the Lord and holy in body and in spirit. But a married woman has to think about her earthly responsibilities and how to please her husband. 35 I am saying this for your benefit, not to place restrictions on you. I want you to do whatever will help you serve the Lord best, with as few distractions as possible.
36 But if a man thinks that he’s treating his fiancée improperly and will inevitably give in to his passion, let him marry her as he wishes. It is not a sin. 37 But if he has decided firmly not to marry and there is no urgency and he can control his passion, he does well not to marry. 38 So the person who marries his fiancée does well, and the person who doesn’t marry does even better.
39 A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. If her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but only if he loves the Lord. 40 But in my opinion it would be better for her to stay single, and I think I am giving you counsel from God’s Spirit when I say this.

-- At best, the Bible is silent regarding same-sex marriage; of course, there is the issue of homosexuality itself, we will discussed the matter later --

B. HOW CHRISTIANS SHOULD RESPOND...
1. Same-sex marriage is on par with other unscriptural marriages
a. Divorce and remarriage can lead to adulterous marriages, we will learn about this in our last lesson for this series.
b. Governments have sanctioned adulterous marriages for years
c. Many Christians have friends and family involved in such marriages
d. As same-sex marriages become common, so will our acquaintance with such
e. We must stand firm in support of truth concerning the institution of marriage
2. As with all people engaged in sinful behavior, we should:
a. Love the sinner while hating the sin
b. Speak the truth in love, not hate look at Ep 4:15:

15 Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church.

c. Reach out with gentleness, patience, humility look at 2Ti 2:24-26:

24 A servant of the Lord must not quarrel but must be kind to everyone, be able to teach, and be patient with difficult people. 25 Gently instruct those who oppose the truth. Perhaps God will change those people’s hearts, and they will learn the truth. 26 Then they will come to their senses and escape from the devil’s trap. For they have been held captive by him to do whatever he wants.

d. Convert them to Jesus as Savior and Lord, willing to obey in all things as stated in Mt 28:18-20
e. We should certainly not fault the children - cf. Eze 18:20
3. As "citizen saints" living in a free society, we should:
a. Pray for our leaders, that we may live peaceable, godly lives as stated in 1Ti 2:1-4
b. Live as sojourners and pilgrims, setting honorable examples as stated in 1Pe 2:11-12 and in Ro 12:1-2
c. Vote for those who respect God's Word on such issues, for it can only "insure domestic tranquility...promote the general welfare" of one's country just look at Pr 14:34:

34 Godliness makes a nation great, but sin is a disgrace to any people.


-- Our response should be no different than with any other sin --

CONCLUSION

1. The institution of marriage has long been under attack, divorce and remarriage for any reason has undermined it for generations, Same-sex marriage is only the latest attack; it probably won't be the last, many choose to simply cohabitate, shack up, live together… rather than marry at all.

2. As Christians confronted with such attacks, let us, remain true to the teachings of Christ and His apostles who illustrated by way of example that God's way is good, acceptable and perfect.

Reach out to all who are lost in sin with both the truth and love that is in Jesus Christ always remembering that when it comes to the institution of marriage we should always remember Heb 13:4

4 Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.

AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!